He had restrictive cardiomyopathy from birth & had his heart transplant on Oct 8, 1997 (he was the boy with the piggyback transplant & had 2 hearts). After being admitted to Children's Hospital on Jan 19, 1998, we were told that he had PTLD as a result of the donor heart being positive for the Epstein-Barr Virus, which he previously had tested negative for. He fought a long, hard, horrible battle, but in the end his poor little body
just wore out.
His whole life was one big battle. His only dream was to race his little sister, Rachel. To run real fast only once. He was able to do that, beating her in a race up the driveway.
When his two hearts beat out their last distinctive rhythm for the last time, our whole family felt a great loss. But, we also knew that he was in a better place, no longer suffering. His last stay in the hospital showed me that life means more than just getting up and going to work. He has inspired a great many people, by showing and sharing a strength that that one can only hope to someday reach.
We all have our hero's, people that we admire, people that we want to emulate. This little boy, who fought so hard his whole life, is who I want to be like when I grow up.
To recognize his 10th birthday, we all went to watch my sister & brother-in-law run in the Pittsburgh Marathon as a relay team called "Christopher's Courage". Next year, my brother & I plan on doing the same.
So, when my day is going bad & I'm about to give up, I think of this little boy, knowing it could be so much worse. Inspiration comes from so many different places. I guess mine has little angel wings and is playing with Legos.
If Roses Grow In Heaven
If Roses grow in Heaven,
Lord please pick a bunch for me,
Place them in my Son's arms
and tell him they're from me.
Tell him I love him and miss him,
and when he turns to smile,
place a kiss upon his cheek
and hold him for awhile.
Because remembering him is easy,
I do it every day,
but there's an ache within my heart
that will never go away.
~ Author Unknown.
" To My Mother"
To my mother the one person I can always count on.
Who gave me all she could in my life to make it wonderful.
Who held me when I was scared, cried with me when I was in pain
Never giving up hope that we would beat the odds. She made my life full.
Always right beside me, her love never ending.
Then I was called to God
She cried in her own pain, yet she never let me go.
I am in her thoughts & prayers everyday of her life.
But through the years I have watched how she has turned
That pain into love for other angel mom's.
She works hard making special gifts for others
So they can remember their angels.
Always working never asking for anything in return.
Today is a day I know that will be hard for her.
It is my birthday, my 28th birthday, a day
I have gone from a teen to an adult.
Another milestone we would have shared.
I need her to know I am proud of her for all she does.
I am okay and free from pain and suffering.
I am always with her just at her side.
She can not see me or hear me
But she knows I'm there.
My mom is the best.
I am so blessed to have her.
Remember mom we will be together one day.
It will be a day for rejoicing
As one special angel enters those golden gates.
That angel will be you, my mom.
The mom I love and cherish.
Always and forever
I love you mom
©2003 Theresa McLeid, All Rights Reserved
When I Am Missing Christopher
(I Close My Eyes)
When I am missing Christopher,
All I need is to close my eyes..
It's then his heart connects to mine
Heaven sends me a loving surprise.
I miss holding him near me each day.
Cause that just isn't within my power.
Oh but I know when I close my eyes,
he'll tell me he's near me every hour.
It matters not the time of day or night,
I close my eyes to feel him near.
Our lives weren't to be this way ...
But it is now what I hold so dear.
I tell you this tonight with tearful eyes.
Cause again much to my surprise;
I can feel his presence near me.
And his love filling the Heavenly skies
For my precious son lives in Heaven.
He watches with the Father's Son.
And when I am missing Christopher,
I close my eyes and we're again one.
Author Kaye Des'Ormeaux, Copyright 2003
Dedicated to Maria, In Loving Memory of Christopher
Christopher's 10th Birthday
Happy Birthday Sweet Christopher.
This the day you were born,
will be bittersweet
for us here who mourn.
Hugs from sister Rachel
and baby brother Mark too.
Siblings here wishing
Happy Birthday to you!
Build Lego block castles
and run cords through the clouds,
as you wait for your family.
Your Mom and Dad so proud.
Fear not our LegoBeaver,
We will never forget you.
Your spirit lives on vividly
through the things Mom and Dad do.
Like doors at our preschool,
the beaver lodge at the zoo,
a glorious angel statue,
all tributes to you.
We know that you are safe
in our Father's arms above.
So upward to heaven
we send you our love.
So blow out those 10 candles
on your fluffy cake of white.
We send you hugs and kisses
Till we greet you in His Light.
Written by Tammy Tobac, Angel Tanner's Mom,
With love for Maria, Ron, Rachel and Mark
as you miss your Christopher on his 10th birthday.
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